Colors of God's Heart

It’s hard to believe that we’re only one day out from Inchelium, as I write.

The reality of it is that I’m reeling. From a load of information learned, from a piece of God’s heart revealed, from a treasure trove of beauty observed.

I’ve said it more than once in the last few days: This is the craziest trip I have ever been on in my two decades of life.

But I also add: I’ve never learned so much in such a short amount of time before. Ever.

Perhaps that’s what humans need more: These moments of intense, power-packed, overwhelming learning. I know I needed it.

You’re never done learning.

I’ve got a whirlwind ahead of me. Summer camp in a week, then fundraising for Thailand, then going to Thailand, and all the busyness that will entail. God’s got me booked until next March.

…what next?

I shrug. Smile.

As long as I learn…

As long as I’m working…

As long as He’s with me…

But wait.

Do I know that He’ll be with me?

Yes. I do.

How do I know?

A promise.

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I huddled in the bus, next to the window, sweatshirt hood pulled down over my eyes. I traced the passing landscape in weariness. No place to stay so far—and we’d tried three places. No one wanted us to stay there.

I stared at the sky. Lord, if only I could know You’re still there. That I’m not as alone as I feel. That You’re interested in what’s happening. That You’re with me…

I smiled, a little sadly. I saw a rainbow earlier. It was so beautiful. If only I could see a rainbow again. It is a promise, after all…

I blinked. Within seconds of my inaudible wish, a small rainbow appeared right where I was looking. Small, but bright, it defied my loneliness and spoke volumes. Ask, and it shall be given thee…

Tears filled my eyes and spilled down my cheeks as I watched that small rainbow grow bigger, brighter, glorious and still more glorious—and then it faded from view and I was staring at an empty, cloudy sky again.

“If we ask anything, according to His will, He heareth us.”

He heard me.

And He answered.

“I promise I’m here.

I promise I’m watching over you.

I promise I’m working—in you and for you.

I promise you’re never alone.

I promise…”

“I love you.”

Heart lifts.

My God loves me.

Enough to tell me so…

Through a rainbow in a stormy sky.

I've seen glimpses of God's heart before...

But I guess I never knew it had an array of colors quite like that.

“Oh yes, He cares, I know He cares… His heart is touched with my grief…When the days are weary, the long nights dreary, I know my Savior cares…”